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   Welcome to my blog! I'll be posting thoughts about art, photos, happenings, and other things that strike me--and hopefully my readers--as interesting. And please visit my website by clicking the link to the right--thanks!

   Also please check out my second blog, The Painting Archives to see older (pre-2004) paintings for sale.


Saturday, February 03, 2007
  struggles
I just left the studio with a lot more questions than answers, which I guess is a good thing, but a bit unsettling. I tried something really different for me, pressing charcoal gesture drawings into wet paint, with fresh and interesting results--but so unlike anything else I've done that I can't quite see claiming them as my own. They're so...figurative. I'll probably end up obscuring the drawings with layers of paint, so I'm not posting any images at this point. I suspect they are just a step in some process that has yet to unfold.

Also in the past few days I have totally destroyed two paintings that I considered close to done and bound for my upcoming show in Milwuakee. I went back into them and made changes that led to other changes, and pretty soon there was not enough left of the original idea to pursue. It is a hard thing to learn, over and over, that destruction often leads to a better creation. There is that long moment when you just feel kind of sick over the loss of what at least had the potential to be good. But I've had this experience so many times, I know what to do...take a deep breath and repeat the magic mantra..."Trust in the process."
 
Comments:
"trust in the process" I like that one a lot too. it's your equivalent of my 'fearless painting"
For a moment it did scare the hell out of me that you destroyed the paintings meant for 'my' show, ahhhrg!
But I'm sure that by that time they will be even better as you can dream now!

Keep warm!
Marina
 
Oh! I thought of that after I wrote my entry--I should have said, Marina--it will be OK! Because I knew you'd be reading this and be startled by this report of destruction.

(My Milwaukee show is going to be at MB Gallery, which is Marina's gallery and also her studio in a great old warehouse building in Milwaukee.)
 
This post is more than vaguely familiar. Ask me how I know.

You're right...trusting the process is the way to go...in the interim it is scary.
 
I can so relate to this post. There is a fine balance between fearlessly diving into a piece and knowing when to put the brakes on. It's always frustrating to realize we've painted past the best stopping point but I guess it also means we're still pushing ourselves.

It is especially frustrating, though, when one is up against a deadline.
 
Thanks for the comments--I suspect this really is a universal experience for artists...I so agree with Shan, it means we are pushing ourselves and as with anything (exercise comes to mind!) that means entering an uncomfortable zone.
 
Rebecca, I found your blog through Karen Jacobs and found it intestesting that you've been trying out charcoal. I've just finished reading Dekooning ' An American Master' (a great book BTW) and he was also drawing with charcoal into wet paint.:)
 
Jacie, thanks for visiting my blog. I just bookmarked yours-it looks interesting! And your most recent post about seeing something you liked in the image of the older painting and wondering why you painted over--that seems like another twist on the same topic we have going here. Sometimes we don't "see" what we have going and so paint over it, and it is only clear in retrospect. Still I think nothing is truly lost in the process--maybe you don't have the physical painting now but someplace in the brain is whatever you agained from doing it. (?)
 
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