It is party season after the long winter here--seems like everyone is eager to have friends over, grill, and sip drinks on the patio. Happily, this coincides with my need for a break after a rather intense five months preparing for the show in Santa Fe
. I shipped the last of the bigger works off on Friday (including the painting above, Border
, 74"x24") and so I'm feeling more relaxed and less frazzled than I have for a long time.
I look back over the time since the show was confirmed, and see that the predictable flow of feelings and action unfolded right on cue--the excitement of being put on the gallery calendar, the flood of ideas and sense of huge possibilities, followed by a lot of hard work, occasional bouts of anxiety, frustration, and fatigue...all overshadowed by a gratifying feeling of accomplishment as each painting was done, and reaching a high point at the finish line.
Now the attitude I am cultivating is "que sera. sera"...the work is done and shipped, and what happens now--the response, attention to my work, sales, whatever--that is out of my hands. This is wisdom that I have at least glimpsed after years of exhibiting. I can't claim to always follow or feel it, but it is a useful guiding thought--that my part is to make the best work I can, and then to let it go out of my thoughts and emotions. It certainly seems the best way to stay sane between now and early August when the show is done.
I don't mean that I won't conduct the usual art biz related to having a show--I'll do my part for promotion of the exhibit, and I really look forward to the opening. But it is possible, at least some of the time, to separate that from expectations about the outcome of the show (I do allow myself the pleasure of imagining everything hung, well-lit, in the beautiful old adobe that houses the gallery...)
A word about Border
...I have had the idea of working with whites, grays and black for quite awhile...and when I placed the panels you see here together, there was a feeling of inevitability, that this accumulation of panels was just right and meant to be. Still it felt, and still feels a bit risky--no strong color here, and the white panel especially is very subtle. My older brother who visited me last week was very drawn to it though, and I suppose that gave me the little push or validation I needed. The fact that I am imagining more work in this palette is also a sign to me that this is a direction to explore.