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   Welcome to my blog! I'll be posting thoughts about art, photos, happenings, and other things that strike me--and hopefully my readers--as interesting. And please visit my website by clicking the link to the right--thanks!

   Also please check out my second blog, The Painting Archives to see older (pre-2004) paintings for sale.

Sunday, October 30, 2016
  my ireland
The phrase "my Ireland" is not meant in any possessive sense--I am only a visitor, passing through for a few weeks on my annual residency (I've been here six times, four at Ballinglen Arts Foundation, where I am currently.) But it seems the right phrase for the moments here that touch me in a deep and personal way, and the sense of belonging here that is so compelling (and a bit mysterious.) Each time I come, I re-discover my Ireland--in both new and familiar experiences--and this feeds my work and soul.

It takes time for this connection to emerge. On my first days here I tend to be a bit scattered, unfocused and tired from travel. I also teach two workshops and usually, as was the case this year, I arrive just a few days before the first begins. I love taking the students out on day trips to some of my favorite places, and to see their responses to the experience. But I am in teacher mode for that time, and more focused on others than on myself. I put off my own need to connect until my residency days, my time between classes, which is a period of just over two weeks.

I'm well into that time now, and gradually, quietly, what I love has revealed itself during my long walks around Ballycastle, or in my quiet studio days. Yesterday I was up on the bog outside the village--a rather desolate landscape, but incredibly ancient and wild. The blanket bog I was walking through has taken millennia to form, and contains traces of a civilization that flourished here over 5000 years ago. It feels fairly solid underfoot, but is mostly water; archaeologists locate ancient stone fences and other constructions by sliding in metal rods until they hit something solid; it requires only moderate pressure to penetrate the bog. Although from a distance the bog looks brown at this time of year, up close the plant life is rich and varied in texture and color. All of this--the bog, the openness, the wind, the clouds, and the fact that no one on earth knew exactly where I was at the moment--brought me to tears.

on the bog

These weren't tears of joy or sadness, but simply the emotional overflow of the moment. I love these moments of intense connection. They happen almost anywhere here--when I am on the shore, along the cliffs, and walking on quiet lanes lined with ancient and intricate hedgerows. Sometimes they come out of some ordinary magic...a cow staring into my cottage window,or a flock of swallows doing their intricate dance overhead at dusk.  They don't always bring me to tears, which is probably a good thing, I'd be a weepy mess. But they do deepen my love for this place. And like any love, these moments have a way of bringing me closer to my true self, my best self.

on Belderrig Pier, photo by Kathleen Schildmeyer

Of course, I spend most of my time in the studio, searching for what links the landscape around me with my inner response. Both drama and subtlety have their place, and there seems to be an unstoppable flow of visual ideas.

On one of my first days here, I was offered an exhibit next October when I return in the Ballinglen Gallery, a beautiful space at the Foundation. I quickly realized that it would be practical to do some work for that show now and store it here, to avoid shipping it later. The director assured me that I could show unframed works on paper, and so I've been working in that direction as well as on small panels.  I'm happy to say that rather than causing me any stress or panic with a need to produce, this plan has instead given me a good sense of purpose and focus. It's also brought forward a few ideas that have been simmering in corners of my art brain for some time. These are related but also distinct, a way to express my various experiences and responses.

I started with some work in acrylic on large paper--not my usual media but I've always enjoyed playing with acrylic, using similar techniques and tools as I do with oil and cold wax. In this case, the medium lent itself to an idea I've had in mind for some time, abstractions based on the moving water of streams in the woods and bogs here, and at the edge of the surf on the beach. These paintings are almost representational but very loosely painted.

untitled works in acrylic on paper, 28"x39" 2016

A conversation with another artist here led me to think more clearly about an underlying concept or title for the show. For now, anyway, that is Motion and Stillness--another idea that has been hovering in my mind, now brought to focus. So, in addition to these very active acrylic paintings, I am also working on a series of oil /cold wax paintings in which quiet areas play against more active ones.

untitled, 12"x12" oil/cold wax on multimedia artboard

And finally, I've been exploring another "hovering" idea--since I was here last year I have thought often about the dense, tangled plant life of the hedgerows that line the lanes here. It has been a very linear idea, and I've worked with it some at home. But a few days ago I distilled the idea to its essence of line, working with water-soluble charcoal and gesso, on the same fairly large sized Fabriano watercolor paper I used for the acrylic paintings.

untitled, 28x39", charcoal and gesso on paper

It makes me smile to think that before I arrived that this year I decided to treat my time between workshops as my vacation, and put no pressure on my self in the studio. Now my walls are filled with this work and more. But it has come with a sense of ease, and lack of stress. I'm not sure where that magic comes from, but I'll take it. Maybe it's just the way things are here, a sort of "whatever will be, will be" attitude that I've absorbed a bit of. These are happy days, quiet, calm, and productive, and fueled by experiencing once again my Ireland. 

You are such a special person Rebecca and the work is amazing!
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       Rebecca Crowell